


stillness in woe

by sonia (aquatulip)



Category: Dangan Ronpa Zero, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Death, F/F, Greek Mytholoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-29 13:19:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3897814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquatulip/pseuds/sonia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>you forget a lot. you forget your own name and your own power. <br/>you also forget that humans die; they die so easily and without living even a hundred years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	stillness in woe

you noticed she had always cried |

//

you meet tsumiki mikan when you are parading as a young woman within town; you had simply grown bored of sitting up high within the heavens, so you bring yourself down to the small town that had always looked so quaint and quiet. you don’t remember the name or anything about the inhabitants. not even when you set human feet onto the ground do you recall anything and everyone you meet slips through your fingertips.

not tsumiki mikan though, she burns into your memory.

when you meet her, there are tears in her eyes that she is trying to wipe away to no avail. there is no apparent reason why she is crying, but she is holding herself over a patient who is drawing in shallow breaths. you think that she may be the most sensitive person that you have ever met as her lips rapidly move as she strings prayers together to send them up to the heavens. she cries for her patients and their pain. you find it remarkable as you watch her from the door. she clutches her hands together tightly, presses her lips against her fingers, and then lets out a sob that shakes her frame. you’ll forget that this just happened, but you wish to memorialize such stark beauty.

you wish to make yourself known to her, but instead of the easy words that were going to ease into the spaces between the both of you, you knock over a box of tissues. for a goddess, you are a clumsy one and you find yourself giggling quietly after nearly taking down expensive medical equipment that is probably necessary for the young nurse. she immediately turns, but doesn’t recognize that you are ethereal, instead she just furiously wipes at her cheeks as she murmurs apology after apology.

“it is okay,” your voice is soft, but pitched high; you don’t know why she is apologizing or why you are here, but you feel as though this is where you should be at right now. “i think i’m injured,” you tell her and her eyes go big as she approaches you to evaluate your damages. it isn’t surprising when she finds nothing wrong with you, but you tell her that you can’t remember anything and a cloudiness envelopes her as she shows you to a secret room and begins to talk to you about your symptoms.

at the end of the session, she hands you a journal and hopes it helps. when your skin touches hers, you feel as though a chasm has opened up beneath you and you’ve fallen in. if only she knew the power that she had over you.

//

you remain within your human form for years until this girl is imprinted within your procedural memory. you know the muscle memory of getting out of bed, getting dressed, then immediately heading towards the medical facility. you have a map in your journal that helps you navigate, but this is all familiar. mikan is always where you find yourself: every day.

she always greets you with the smallest smile that seems like a secret to the both of you; she still doesn’t know so much about you, but there is so much of yourself that you do not know. why you were cursed by the king of gods, you will never know, but you wish to repent, just so you can always remember tsumiki mikan and her infallible kindness. there are pieces of her heart scattered all over the town, so many people care for the small town nurse who loves each and every one of her patients with all her heart.

every time you visit her though, there are tears streaming down her face. you keep a running tally within the back of your journal. how many days she trips over herself, then curls up and sobs until she can’t feel her chest and it is hard to breathe. it is so hard to exist. you know all of this because you write down what she says to you into your journal. you write about how she feels and how she hates how she can’t just cure all of her patients; you write about how she grows flowers and gives them out to everyone because everyone means so much to her. you write down how she doesn’t like chocolate, and how her eyes are so warm that you keep getting lost in them.

you write down the moment that she wonders why you don’t age naturally like the others in the village and how you came from nowhere, and you write down how her lips felt when you kissed her for the very first time. it had been right after she had taken your temperature and you leaned in to ghost your lips against her forehead, but she had a moment of courage wherein she pressed close to you as her lips met your own. you had melted into the sheets of the hospital bed and pieces of you would forever remain within that room where you realized that you were in love with tsumiki mikan.

you forget about that kiss, but it isn’t the last kiss, only the first. according to your journal, you have shared so many kisses with tsumiki that you have lost count. each kiss is an endless declaration of love and you are so happy with her even if you cannot remember much of her. whenever you meet with her, she is always so soft and when you nestle into the crook of her neck, she breathes a shaky sigh of relief and happiness and combs her fingers through your messy hair.

//

you also forget that humans die; they die so easily and without living even a hundred years. mikan’s skin sag and she looks at you as though you are the fountain of youth and you still kiss her fervently, but she can only whimper against your lips as she realizes that you are immortal and holy. “i spent the rest of your life here, with you,” you say. you are only sure of that because of your journal that is sitting on your lap, opened to one of the last pages.

a page for every day that mikan had left. the last page already had writing on it; a message from mikan herself that confessed her love for you. you read it every morning that you wake up and feel a warmth spreading throughout you as your nerves sing and your heart beats rapidly.

but this means that today is tsumiki mikan’s last day alive. today is the day that she dies and no longer will you be able to hold her close or kiss her lips and even though you won’t remember any of it if you don’t want to, you want to remember. you’ve never wanted to remember someone so badly.

while she is still breathing, you lean down and kiss her: once, then twice, and she loses her breath easily, but still kisses you so eagerly. tears settle in her eyes as she watches you and your immortal beauty. you don’t age and how you appear now is how she’s always seen you. within your own eyes, you feel tears well and fall. “i’ll miss you,” she says. “as long as i remember you, i’ll miss you.”

“i won’t remember you,” you giggle softly, “but i’ll always miss you.”

your teardrops fall onto her skin and she smiles sadly up at you through her own tears as they slide down her cheeks. her skin is growing cold and you don’t want her life to end as you scribble endlessly into your journal. she falls asleep, then falls into oblivion.

//

and you would have forgotten her completely if you didn’t invent the raindrops that reminded you so much of her glittering tears. the way the heavens cried was beautiful and tragic and when the icy droplets hit your skin, you were reminded of a love that was bitter and stung you down to your core when it ended. you remember tsumiki mikan in the form of the dancing droplets and you let them shower you with tragedy and love.


End file.
